How do we parent our kids online? It's an important question as our kids seem to increasingly spend more time interacting in the online world than they do in the offline world. In fact, I am probably dating myself by distinguishing between 'online' and 'offline' when, for teens, there has been a convergence of these worlds. Teens don't often distinguish between online and offline, but go about their daily lives communicating seamlessly. It is more about interacting than how they interact.
So, where do we start? It can seem a bit overwhelming when you take a broad look at how our kids can get online – computers, mobile phones, gaming devices, PDAs, and some MP3 players – each posing potential risks; and, what they can do while they're online. (See our article on "Getting a Handle on Devices" for more information.)
My recommendation is to break it down and start with the 3 E's:
Engage
Engage in discussions with your kids about their online activity. Learn about how they're getting online and what they like to do while online. It is important to keep the dialogue going because the Internet and technology are constantly evolving – what is in today will be out tomorrow
Educate
Educate yourself! Learn about the different online services and Internet-enabled devices that your kids are using, the risks posed and available safeguards. You don't have to be an expert in the services or use of the devices, but simply realize their capabilities, both pros and cons.
Educate your kids! Teach them about the risks that these services and devices present and how they can protect themselves. Remember this is no different than educating them about dangers in the real world. Think about the first discussion you had with your children regarding "stranger danger."
Empower
Empower yourself by using parental controls to monitor and/or control you kid's online activity. Most Internet-enabled devices offer parental controls. Monitoring will help you keep an eye on where they are going and what they're doing. Having this information gives you discussion points for continuous engagement. Controls will help also prevent your kids from accessing material that may be inappropriate for their age.
Empower your kids by helping them set up available tools like privacy and communication settings, and helping them to understand that that they can take control of their online experience through use of these tools. (See our article on "Privacy Settings for Social Networks" for more information.)
It is important to realize that, just as in the offline world, parenting online never comes to a stop. It's a never-ending cycle of conversations, learning, monitoring and protecting.
To support the 3 E's, it is my hope that this post serves as an introduction that will lead to a series of in-depth explorations into the various online services as well as the devices on the market. If there is a particular service or device that you would like us to blog about, send us feedback using the Send Feedback link above.



Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Elizabeth 10-06-2008 @ 9:55PM
I speak to my children honestly (and often) about Internet safety. My teenage son seems to be fairly careful. For my younger children, I bought this software I found from a Googled description of what I wanted, called imonitorpc and I can literally deny them access to lots of sites just by having the computer watch for keywords, keysites, etc. This makes me feel a lot better about their Internet access, and gives me some time to continue these conversations, to educate them, and keep them safe in the meantime while they're learning more about what it really means to be online and how dangerous that can be.
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EDUARDO SANTANDER 10-07-2008 @ 9:49AM
Not have children
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EDUARDO SANTANDER 10-07-2008 @ 9:53AM
No tengo niños soy solo, viudo y tengo 93 años, soy honesto y persona desente. Dejenme en paz y no me molesten mas con parental control,ya les dije que soy solo. eduardo sanander.
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Archana Shekar 12-14-2008 @ 11:23PM
Nice informative article. It makes us to be aware of the internet and its dangers .Not only parental control will help the parents along with that we have to have block websites and allow only websites which should be used by them.
Archana Shekar
online safety advisor- www.8falcons.com
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Julia Benett 12-17-2008 @ 2:31PM
Some time ago my child spent all his free time surfing the web and my husband and I decided to restrict Internet access. I bought internet filtering software called Ez Internet Timer:
http://www.internettimer.net/
It can stop all children’s on-line activity and block Internet browsers, e-mails, ftps or messengers according to my daily schedule.
But today Internet contains an enormous amount of information that can be offensive to adults, and unsuitable and sometimes downright dangerous to children, so we are thinking about purchasing of another application from IT Works Corporation - Ez Parental Control (powerful and very easy). It will protect my child by restricting access to any website url such as adult content.
I hope this information will save someone's time :)
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